Saturday, May 22, 2010

You're Only as Good as the Company You Keep

I feel compelled to stay in tonight. I do not want to go out to a bar or to a house party. I just want to stay in the seclusion of my dorm room — I just want to be alone.

In my opinion, there are two types of alone: pitiful lonesomeness and peaceful solitude.

Pitiful lonesomeness is, well, pitiful. This is the type of alone that leaves you feeling dejected and sorrowful. This is the type of alone that leaves you feeling like you have nothing and no one. This alone sucks.

Peaceful solitude is heavenly. This is the type of alone that makes you feel complacent. This is the type of alone that makes you happy, happy with yourself and happy with all around you. This alone is wonderful, and, in college, this alone is rare.

Tonight, I am peacefully alone. I willingly opted out of social inclusion tonight. Don't get me wrong, I am a very social creature, but sometimes, I just need a break. During the week, I am constantly surrounded by others; meetings, dinner dates, classes, workout sessions — people everywhere. I like people, and I like this company. But I also like myself.

Tonight, I am simply in the company of myself. I am (happily) alone.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Tick Tock on the Clock

I frequently feel compelled to check the time. Actually, "frequently" is an understatement; I literally cannot go longer than seconds without looking at a clock.

I have checked the time about five times since starting this post.

I like to fill my time with meaningful tasks. My capabilities in time management are impeccable. I pack my days full with so many activities that I sometimes worry my days might explode. Of course, I am merely using personification. Days do not explode; they overflow. Monday overflows into Tuesday, Tuesday overflows into Wednesday, and on and on. There is not enough time in the day, but I undoubtedly use what limited time there is in the day in the most efficient way possible.

I do not waste time. Yet, sometimes, I wish I did.

There is not much in this world I actually hope to lose. I do not like to misplace things, and I do not like to search for lost items. But I love losing track of time.

Talking with friends, playing games, dancing, laughing -- time slips from my grasp when I am engaging in these activities. It would be nice to do these things a little more often; it would be nice to lose track of time a little more often.

The best part of losing track of time? That is easy. No searching is involved with the misplacement of time. Passed time is irretrievable. There is no point in obsessing over time lost because, well, it can never be repossessed. Time is one thing that I can accept not having control over.

time |tīm|
the indefinite continued progress of existence and events in the pastpresent, and future regarded as a whole

Like the definition says, time is continually progressing. Time cannot be paused, and it is uncertain when time will run out. So, go use your time wisely. Actually, go lose your time wisely.
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